Summer-breath — suffering much

rozova

the exact description of this blog, lol

Fuckfuckfuck.
Everything sucks.
Badbadbad.
I'm so tired.
Sad.
Crying.

Oh, I'm fine, look at me, I'm cool, I'm strong, I'm moving on.

Ah, no, I'm not. Sorry, my mistake.
Hello, darkness, my old friend.

#silly me #suffering much

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rozova

"super only friend" my ass

I think I know what's wrong with me. It's that feeling, the realization that… Well, I'm not a priority anymore. Simple as that.

#friends #love life #suffering much

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rozova

all black zebra

So, how long does bad luck usually lasts? When do I get to jump to a next page?

#suffering much

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rozova

am I that stupid?

Think about it, jeez!
Why do you keep tormenting yourself and cry your eyes out. I hope that's PMS, but you know it's not only that.
It's never gonna go away that way. Or heal.
It was so silly of you to think that the change of scenery and activities on itself is going to help. Nothing is gonna make you stop hurting except you.
So start acting like an adult. Make the right choices. Like you did once already. You did make a right one and you know it. So make some more.
And when you do - once you do! - stick to it.

#friends #love life #silly me #suffering much

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rozova

I hate myself during PMS.

#PMS bitch #family #suffering much

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rozova

Madilyn Bailey – Scars (Papa Roach cover)

I've always cared too much. About everything. But this song in particular is connected to a hard period of my life (I think it was May of 2016.)
The period when I was trying to mend the heart of the man I loved. I was trying to help him get over a girl he kept loving even when he started dating me. And it was painful. And I wanted to end it. He was driving me crazy. And the fact that I couldn't help him made me feel so powerless and useless.
"I can't help you fix yourself,
But at least I can say I tried".
And I did try. Very hard. "I'm sorry, but I gotta move on with my own life". And I so desperately wanna move on. I'm trying really hard.
But I still care too much and it's very painful. Sometimes I just wanna be a cold-hearted bitch.

#love life #soundtrack of my life #suffering much

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rozova

I am the pain.

#silly me #suffering much

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rozova

Please, let me go.

#love life #my broken mind #silly me #suffering much

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rozova

can't even move out properly

Oh, c'mon, universe! What have I done? Why can't things ever go my way?
I'm so tired of hoping and never actually getting anything.
Just tired.

#home #just my luck #suffering much

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rozova

sick

I need a therapist or something.

#my broken mind #suffering much

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rozova

very much sucks

I am deep.
Me, hey, hello, I'm here. Pull me out.

#silly me #suffering much

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rozova

all over again

Oh, that's just great!
Yeah, let's start this shit all over, you being a selfish bastard, me being a little selfish victim.
Fucking hate it.
You know I hurt.
And yet you do stuff, just "cause you shouldn't".
I know I shouldn't. But it's fucking how it is.

The funny part is, I still don't hate.

#friends #suffering much

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rozova

and how do I figure that out?

I either stopped feeling this void inside me or got used to it. Not quite sure…

#silly me #suffering much

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rozova

simple as that

I JUST WANT NOT TO CARE!

#love life #suffering much

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rozova

never wanted this Santa Barbara in my life

When you do your best, but still wanna cry at any moment of the day. And sometimes do, not even yourself knowing the clear reason.
And it's not like something extraordinary happened.
I guess I'm just… tired. And maybe lonely. But mostly morally exhausted.
I need some rest. And peace.
Wanna take a break from everything and just go to another city or even country. Forget about all my troubles for a week. Relax. Gain some strength.

Seas and forests of the world, come to me. Since I can't come to you.

#friends #love life #suffering much

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